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Tips For Better Relationship Between Husband & Wife

Tips For Better Relationship Between Husband & Wife
Although many Muslims may be in a failing marriage at this moment and on a fast track to divorce and its terrible consequences, there are many ways to put their marriage back on the right track if the husband and wife are sincere in their desire to reconcile.
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Source:  Extract from Happy Marital Life in Light of Shariah
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  • Although many Muslims may be in a failing marriage at this moment and on a fast track to divorce and its terrible consequences, there are many ways to put their marriage back on the right track if the husband and wife are sincere in their desire to reconcile. The following principles can be applied by Muslims whose marriages is currently in trouble or by Muslims who would like to avoid any problems in their marriage.

  • Examples of Negative relationship of Husband & Wife
    Many Muslim spouses treat each other as adversaries rather than partners. Some husbands feel that they are the bosses and whatever they says goes. While some wives feels that they must squeeze everything they can out of their husband, never showing their husband that they are satisfied with anything he does or buys for them in order to trick him into doing and buying more. This makes him feel like a failure if he is unable to give them the lifestyle that their friends and families enjoy. Other husbands speak very harshly toward their wives, humiliating them, and even physically abuse them, with their wives having no voice or opinion in the family.

  • Marriage in The Sight of Allah
    It is very sad that a relationship which Allah (SWT) has established for the good has become a source of contention, deception, trickery, tyranny, humiliation, and abuse. This is not the purpose of marriage.  Allah (SWT) says about in the Holy Quran, “He created for you mates from among yourselves, that you may dwell in tranquility with them; and He has placed love and mercy between your (hearts)” (30:21, Yusuf Ali Translation).

  • Do not be a Tyrant
    Muslims are not supposed to be dictators and tyrants and this specifically applies to the husband, regardless of whether or not Islam has made him the head of the house,, instead we are taught to treat our wives well. The Prophet Muhammad (sallallahu alaiyhi wasallam) was reported to have said, “The most perfect Muslim in the matter of faith is one who has excellent behavior and the best among you are those who behave best towards their wives." (From Mishkat al-Masabih, No. 278(R) Transmitted by al-Tirmidhi).

  • Be Partners in the Decision Making Process.
    Follow the principle of shura and make decisions as a family. This will create harmony within the family as decisions will not be imposed and everyone will feel that they had some part in the decision making.

  • Never be Emotionally Abusive
    Never be emotionally, mentally, or physically abusive to your spouse. The Prophet (sallallahu alaiyhi wasallam) never mistreated his wives and is reported to have said, “How can they beat their women in daytime as slaves and sleep with them in the night?"

  • Be Mindful of Your Words
    Be very careful what you say when upset. Sometimes you may say things in anger that would never have been said in calm. If you become angry, wait until you are calm before resuming the conversation.

  • Show Affection
    Show affection for your mate. Be kind, gentle, and loving.

  • Be a Friend to Your Spouse
    Show interest in your spouse’s life. Too often, we live in the same house but do not know anything about each other's lives. It would be great if the husband and wife can work together for the same cause or on the same project.

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